Peter Reynolds

The life and times of Peter Reynolds

Cannabis Causes Tennis Elbow Which Could Lead To Cancer

with 25 comments

It Was In The Daily Mail. It Must Be True!

After all the brave and courageous work that the Daily Mail has done in demonising drugs, particularly in explaining how very, very dangerous cannabis is, tonight its editors and journalists gathered in an atmosphere of self-righteous gloom and sanctimonious misery.  The BBC has ruined it all.

The headline reads: “BBC Slammed For “How Drugs Work” Show Which Glamorises Illegal Substances”.  (Snappy, eh?) See here for the Mail’s valiant and noble defence against this wicked tide of reason and common sense.

Surely something can be done to shut the BBC up?

Can’t James “Broken Britain” Brokenshire come up with some ministerial order or something to stop them telling the truth?

Let’s get the punters back on the booze. That’s where the tax revenue come from.  More importantly, that’s where so much of ministers’ jollies, perks and, you know, fun and excitement comes from.  I mean there’s Ascot, Glyndebourne, Henley, Twickers, Eton old boys day, Wembley.  I mean, all these events are founded on a good old piss up – and the brown envelopes from the big booze companies, well they do come in very handy you know!

That’s what we want to get the hoi polloi back to.  That’ll keep em happy and docile. (Don’t tell ’em about Charlie and his snifters.  Let’s keep that between ourselves, eh?)

I know the truth has been allowed to leak out.  More and more are realising how dangerous alcohol is.  You really mustn’t mention it, even alongside heroin and cocaine.  We can’t afford the scientific comparison. It doesn’t support our case.  We must not allow them to realise how bad it is.  All we need to do is come up with some good scare story.  The schizophrenia thing doesn’t seem to have worked.  What about…what about…what about?  Tennis elbow?  Yes, tennis elbow!

What do you think?  You know, all that picking the spliff up, putting it down.  Yes!  That’s it!  Cannabis causes tennis elbow.   Get it out now!

Cannabis causes tennis elbow – which could lead to cancer.  Call the press conference now!

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25 Responses

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  1. […] here: Cannabis Causes Tennis Elbow Which Could Lead To Cancer « Peter … Tagged with: brave • courageous-work • daily • demonising-drugs • elbow […]

  2. You can get tennis elbow from lifting a pint… oh no wait, that’s different, its not tennis elbow because lots of people have it, its responsible law-abiding-elbow… we can fix that without men in wigs…

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/12299877

    Jake

    January 29, 2011 at 1:18 am

  3. […] more: Cannabis Causes Tennis Elbow Which Could Lead To Cancer « Peter …   January 28th, 2011 Uncategorized Tags: brave, courageous-work, daily, […]

  4. […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Peter Reynolds, Peter Reynolds. Peter Reynolds said: Cannabis Causes Tennis Elbow Which Could Lead To Cancer: http://wp.me/pgXXJ-X8 […]

  5. You should check the comments under the DM article. They are resoundingly pro GOOD information. The tide is turning DM… TRUTH is at last winning the battle.

    Nick

    January 29, 2011 at 12:16 pm

  6. Jeez, didn’t know that series doc pissed off so many anti-drug ppl. I had mixed opinions about the canna doc but now knowing that it pissed off the propagandists at the Daily Mail makes me smile. And yeah i agree the comments to that Dm article do seem to be pro good information. I havent seen the cocaine or mdma shows but I wonder if they compared the liver damage from mdma to liver damage caused by alcohol? In the cannabis special, they stated that cannabis increases you chances of cannabis by 5x, what did that say about cocaine? 100x? Also did they compare the heart risks of cocaine to prescription drugs such as the multitude of amphetamines doctors prescribe? Im gonna hafta watch the coke n xtc vids…

    Rumhann

    January 29, 2011 at 1:20 pm

  7. Correction: …they stated that cannabis increases your chance of >heart attacks< by 5x…

    Rumhann

    January 29, 2011 at 1:23 pm

  8. To quote Bill Hicks . . .

    “I’ve had good times on drugs, that’s a fact. I’ve had bad times on drugs, too, ok? But I’ve had good and bad relationships…an I’m not giving up pu$$y.”

    Cupid Stunt

    January 29, 2011 at 1:53 pm

  9. Dear Mr Daily Mail,

    What a complete wally you are! You really do make more and more of a fool of yourself every day. Don’t you realise that people see straight through your lies, misinformation and propaganda? Don’t you realise that to most reasonable people in Britain you are a sick joke? However much fear and panic you try to sow in society, people have just stopped listening to you because they know that most of what you say is utter rot.

    I am concerned about you because in the past you have been a useful and upstanding member of society. Now you’ve become a complusive liar, a delinquent and a confidence trickster. If you’re not careful soon you’ll find yourself on fraud charges for asking people to pay for something which isn’t what it says it is. Come on, you’re not a newspaper, you’re a propaganda sheet for the deluded and oppressive party.

    Actually the sooner they lock you up the better. Maybe you’ll get some treatment for your illness then.

    Get well soon,

    Peter

    Peter Reynolds

    January 29, 2011 at 2:25 pm

  10. ‘Get well soon’….. Cracks me up Peter.

    The Daily Mail is BAD…..Ummkay

    Nick

    January 29, 2011 at 2:38 pm

  11. Don’t knock the BBC3 article – they quoted me in it……

    That means they must have read your blogg to get it!

    With my now proven psychic abilities – I forsee “Cannabis made me kill fluffy kitten” headlines looming in a Tabloid near you. Possibly even my voicemail being hacked.

    Funny they haven’t posted my comment to the article as it’s being “modderated”.

    Perhaps we should start a facebook campaign to boycott the Tabliods – Someting like “Fed up of Tabloid lies – Show them by not buying a paper on :” and set a date of Newspaper circulation slaughter.

    Nothing upsets an Editor more than ABC figures being damaged.

    Mr Bimble

    January 29, 2011 at 5:19 pm

  12. Tennis elbow? Shit I better stop smoking!!!!

    Did you also know that you can catch herpes from reading the Daily Mail? I have proof on the level of the anti-drugs lot, see below;

    I know 3 people who have had herpes, none have slept together or with the same people, but all three read an article in the DM shortly before they were diagnosed. Therefore, it must be true that you can catch herpes from the DM!

    Shit, with that logic, I could be the next Brokenshire!

    FFAAnon1

    January 29, 2011 at 8:24 pm

  13. What is wrong with telling the truth about soft and hard drugs?

    When will they make a distinction between use and abuse?

    When will they understand that taking between 1 and 5 percent of these so called evil drugs from the street is absolute failure?

    Legalise and regulate. That is farm more intelligent. Drug dealers are not pushing the drugs on us. we are demanding them.

    Architect

    January 29, 2011 at 9:32 pm

    • It’s politically inconvenient to admit that not all use is abuse, so wouldn’t hold your breath.

      It’s a bit like the claim that purchasing from a dealer is funding criminals. Because _they_ decided it was illegal to sell drugs, the dealer is a criminal. So they are right, but only because they created a paradox.

      It’s exactly the kind of attitude that led to Theresa May saying you can’t compare the harms of a legal activity to that of an illegal one (a line which was recently repeated in a letter the Home Office sent to me).

      In short, it’s political word and mind games aimed solely at encouraging the kind of prejudice that can help put an end to any legitimate use.

      FFAAnon1

      January 29, 2011 at 10:00 pm

  14. lulz suppose its better than this..
    http://www.nursingtimes.net/whats-new-in-nursing/cannabis-link-to-testicular-cancer/1987982.article
    and this..,
    http://www.metro.co.uk/news/526693-cannabis-may-cause-testicular-cancer
    lol@ “may” cause testicular cancer!
    This was originally on the bbc news website but funnily enough its been taken off the bbc. Not even google cache picks it up now.

    jimbob

    January 30, 2011 at 1:26 pm

    • Ha! Ha! This reminded me of this excellent clip from “How to Get Ahead in Advertising”:

      Unfortunately, the sound is out of synch, which does spoil it a bit.

      pjmcneill

      February 8, 2011 at 10:57 pm

  15. The Daily Fail missed the point on this little snippet – I wonder if it was chosen for a purpose?

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1351831/Cher-Lloyd-jets-Britain-LA.html

    Cher lloyd – X-factor looser with sarcastic prohibitionist Tee-shirt shocker.

    Amy Whitehouse Version 2 m’kay.

    Mr Bimble

    January 30, 2011 at 2:58 pm

  16. Peter, did you see this?

    http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b00y37cn/Cannabis_Whats_the_Harm_Episode_1/

    If so what are your views?

    Stephen

    January 30, 2011 at 10:11 pm

    • Of course I saw it Stephen. It was excellent and the star was Jason Reed, my friend and a regular commenter here.

      Peter Reynolds

      January 31, 2011 at 6:53 pm

      • Aah. Just that you havn’t seemed to have mentioned it before but did mention the other one which I felt was a poorer version. By the way there was a facebook event called “one big smoke birmingham” for november and it disappeared at like 4000 confirmed attendances. I say your post the day before it seemed to shut. What happened?

        Stephen

        February 1, 2011 at 6:12 pm

      • Albi Karms ran off with all the money from selling T-shirts! He’d done nothing at all to liaise with the authorities over the event. I don’t think he set out to be a crook. He just got totally out of his depth.

        Peter Reynolds

        February 1, 2011 at 7:38 pm

      • What and he kept the money to himself? Isn’t that illegal?

        Stephen

        February 1, 2011 at 8:47 pm

      • Could we start a ‘Wheres Waldo?’ themed book called ‘Wheres Albi?’ it’s sales could raise money for next years Smoke Up event & then we could run off with the profits.

        Rumhann

        February 1, 2011 at 8:56 pm

  17. “More importantly, that’s where so much of ministers’ jollies, perks and, you know, fun and excitement comes from. I mean there’s Ascot, Glyndebourne, Henley, Twickers, Eton old boys day, Wembley. I mean, all these events are founded on a good old piss up – and the brown envelopes from the big booze companies, well they do come in very handy you know!”

    And how many bars are there in the Houses of Parliament?

    Nobody seems to know, but I have seen the figures 14 and 19 quoted. If you search this question, a reply on Answers.com gives 54.

    Alcohol-fuelled politics.

    pjmcneill

    February 8, 2011 at 10:14 pm


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